Sermon of 09-01-01

"COMMUNICATION = RELATIONSHIP"

Scripture - Rev. 3:20; "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."

To start this morning sermon off, I would like to invite you to listen to a proposal I found in my files not long ago. Oh, in case any of you single people need a proposal, you may want take note. It goes like this: I'm asking you to be my wife. However, there are a few certain qualification I will need you to consider first. First, I wish it to be understood up front that I love my mother more than I do you. You should be able to understand this since I have known her much longer than I've known you. Second, if in our marriage we ever come to a crisis where a major decision must be made, of course you understand I will first consult with my father rather than you. You must understand and accept the fact that my father is older and much wiser than you are. In fact he owes his own business that I hope to take over someday and make a name for myself. Third, I'm reserving my room at my parents home. If you are wondering why? It is because I plan to spend most of my time there. My family is a very close family. I feel it is my responsibility to help keep the family unity as it has always been. My nine brothers and sisters mean a lot to me and I must spend most of time visiting with them so I'm sure you won't mind spending most your time alone. Fourth, a word about my property. You must again accept the fact that my property belongs to me and me alone. If you should decide to accept my proposal then I will need to you to sign some legal documents making no claims whatsoever on any of my property or money. I hope you understand that I love my money and find it very hard sharing it with others, including you. I'm sure a smart and clever woman like you will be able to find a good job to support yourself. Oh yes, and another thing. I cannot bear sickness, tears, or sorrow so please do not ever expect me to give you any sympathy or attention. I need my sleep and do not need you bothering me with your personal problems. You will need to bear your on crosses and learn to always walk with your chin up. But I do want you to be my wife. As such you will carry the full responsibility of raising the children, cooking the meals three times a day. You will need to keep the house clean and lawn mowed. This will free me up to be able to give my full attention to my mother, father, brothers and sisters, and my property and business. You are a nice woman and I feel sure we can have some nice times together. Will you say yes? If you do, then I will go and ask my mother if it will be all right with her and Dad. 

Oh yes, before I forget to explain, if there is a wedding then your family will have to stand for the total expense. Is there anyone here this morning needing a copy of my proposal? 

And in case you are wondering, no this is not the one I used asking Kathy to marry me. The truth is, it is a ridiculous proposal isn't it? What kind of woman would accept to the sort of terms? 

Now I would like to re-do the proposal. Change a few things around. See if this doesn't sound as ridiculous.

I'm asking you to be my God. However, there will be a few standards I will need You to live up to. First, I wish it to be understood up front that I love myself more than I do You. My family and friends are also more important to me than You. You should be able to understand this since I have known them much longer than I've known You. Second, if it ever should come to a crisis where a major decision must be made, of course you understand I will first consult with my own wishes rather than Yours. Some of Your ideas seem very strange to me. And if I ever plan to make a name for myself in the business world, I cannot be tied down to Your rules. I must be able to work any and all days of the week that I'm needed to. Third, I'm reserving my right to my own time. If You are wondering why? It is because I'm a very busy person and cannot be expected to spend time in communion with You day after day. Whatever time I have leftover from my work must be spent camping, fishing or golfing. Watching the Dallas Cowboys or Texarkana Bandits. Fourth, a word about my property. You must again accept the fact that my property belongs to me and me alone. I hope you understand that I love my money and find it very hard sharing it with others, including You. Since You own the cattle upon a thousand hills as well all the gold and silver in the world, I see no reason for You to make claims on any of my property or money. Oh yes, and another thing. I cannot bear sickness, tears, or sorrow so please do not ever expect me enter into fellowship with You in suffering. I have no desire to become involved in service to others. Bear Your on cross and leave me out of it. But I do want You to be my God. As such You will carry the full responsibility of providing me with Salvation, showering me with blessings and for answering all my prayers the moment I ask them. This will free me up to be able to give my full attention to myself, my mother, father, friends and family, property, job, the Dallas Cowboys and Texarkana Bandits. Under the above conditions I could enjoy having You as my God and I feel we could have some nice times together.

Will You say yes? If You do, then please begin construction at once on my Heavenly mansion. And please prepare me a spot at the Marriage Supper of the Lamb. I plan to be there if Dallas isn't playing and the fish aren't biting. 

Hopefully this sounded just as ridiculous as the first proposal.

This morning I would like to compare a marriage relationship to our love relationship with God. Let's go back to the moment when two people meet for the first time. Initially two people are introduced and if they like what the see and hear about each other they start dating. They begin communicating to each other their likes and dislikes. Then as the communication continues a relationship develops. And if that relationship continues soon that strange thing we call love comes along. And if love continues then isn't long until wedding bells begin to chime. Soon the husband and wife to be find themselves in front of the altar holding hands and saying, "I do" to each other. Both of them are convinced that their marriage was made in heaven. They are just what the doctor ordered for each other. They're a prefect match for life. Then if life continues things change. Some for good, some for the bad. 

Sad but true, but in the first seven years after a wedding, some 50% of all married couple's soon discover that their marriage was not made in heaven but the other place. So what happened to that 50%? What went wrong? 

Throughout my studies in Christian Psychology and Family Biblical Counseling, I've discovered that the majority of divorces are caused because of miscommunication. Couples just stop communicating with each other. They become disconnected with what the other is saying.

But friends, communication is the key word to any happy marriage. I've thought for years of changing my wedding sermon to just one word, communication. Tie the knot and have them go on their merry way. Seminars and experts have for years said there are several major reasons why communication breaks down in any marriage. Some of those reasons are; Money, religion, in-laws or family, children, things in common or lack of things in common, sex and the roles of each other.

Many experts believe that 70% of marriages that are no longer are because of money. I guess they forget what Luke 12:15 says; "Take heed, and beware of covetousness: for a man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth."

Material things get the best of many couple's today. People want to buy, buy, buy. Plastic money is taking more and more marriages down. Some today pay out more in interest on credit cards than they give to God each month. They blame each other for spending too much. He wants a bigger boat, more tools, and faster car. She wants a new dress each week, new shoes for each outfit, and a matching purse. 

And slowly the communication breaks down between each other. And as the communication breaks down so does the relationship. And as the relationship breaks down so does the love. And this same principle not only works with a marriage, but also our relationship with our children and each other. Well, can't this principle also work with our relationship with God? Of course it does.

Now when we communicate with each other it is called talking. When we communicate with God it is called prayer. And as we pray and study Gods Word, a relationship develops between us and God. And just like any marriage, if the communication continues so does the relationship. And it's not long until a love relationship develops. In fact 1 John 4:19 says; "We love him, because he first loved us."

This is a deeper love than any marriage will ever experience. It's a love that will never disappoint us. A love that is strong. A love that is true. And if this love continues, and it will unless you break it off, soon wedding bells will begin to chime. Did you know that Jesus wants to get married? Turn with me to Revelation 19:7-9 and listen to these words. "Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and his wife hath made herself ready. And to her was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen, clean and white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints. And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed [are] they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb."

You and I are invited to the Supper of the Lamb. Jesus is getting tried of long distant prayer phone calls. He wants us to come and sit down and eat with Him. He is waiting. He is excited. He's waiting for His bride to be, you and me. Jesus is more excited about us coming than we are about going! He's so excited that He is preparing our mansions, a great feast of a supper. And friends as long as our communication continues so will our relationship. If the communication breaks down so will the relationship. It's that simple and communication is that important! I hope you understand that. I pray you accept that.

I read a story about a seminar that had been given where the question was asked, "Who is suppose to initiate and say they are sorry first when there has been a problem or argument. The one who was right or the one who was in the wrong?" Most said the one in the wrong should first. "No that's wrong said the instructor. The one in the wrong is too emotionally disturbed to be able to admit they are wrong. It must always be the one in the right to take the first steps in saying I'm sorry."

Well I've been initiating and saying I'm sorry first to Kathy ever since I found out about this principle. But I believe that instructor played a fast one on me because I don't always feel better when I say I'm sorry first.

But when you look at God you find that this principle is always true. When sin entered into this world, who was it that took the first step? It was the one in the right wasn't it? And whenever you or I make a mistake today, it is the same Jesus that looks for us that looked for Adam and Eve when they sinned. He still takes the first steps when we make a mistake. He is the One that stands at our door of our hearts knocking asking to come in. To come in and have supper with us. To tell us that He loves us and there nothing we can do or not do that will stop that love. Every time you and I look at His hands we see our sin that placed the scars there. But every time He looks at His hands He sees our names. Names of His children He will never forget. He sees scars that say I love you and want to visit with you everyday.

Friends, communication is very important in marriage. But even more important is our communication with our Father in heaven. The communication we have with God today will make the difference in our relationship with Him tomorrow. Some wedding preparation takes a long time, so I pray you are starting to prepare for yours with God today. 

Texarkana SDA Church 3100 Pleasant Grove Road Texarkana, Texas

Printed From Texarkana SDA Church Website http://www.tagnet.org/texarkana