ATC Part 5 Peter

At the Cross

Part 5: Peter

NARRATOR:

We now call as witness Peter, one of Jesus' disciples. Peter, your life surely has been changed by the death of your leader.

Peter

It's all a nightmare. It's impossible that tomorrow I will wake up and Jesus won't be there. He has always been there. He drew me to Him. I knew He loved me, even with all my faults. Somehow He could see into me--the fisherman who put on all the bluster to hide my inner weaknesses. And He liked me in spite of what He saw.

There now, you see what He's done to me. A year ago I never could have admitted that I had any inner weaknesses. He has a way with people that changes them. Changes them for the better.

That's why He's got to be here tomorrow. He can't really be dead. He's everything that means anything in this life anymore. He is hope. He is healing. He is strength. He is life itself. He gives meaning to life.

He has to be here tomorrow. . . . I have to be able to explain to Him what went wrong. He'll understand. I know He will. He always does. He knew me so well. He knew what I would do even before I did it. He even told me so. . . .

I've been through it a hundred times while I watched Him there on the cross. What could I have done differently. Would it have made any difference? . . . . .

I started out so well--with such good intentions. I was going to prove to Jesus that I was a better, truer friend than He thought.

We could sense from Jesus' behavior, that He expected some great climax to come that night--that He expected the authorities to try to stop Him in some way.

I knew we couldn't let that happen--that this was the time we all had been waiting for--when Jesus would reveal Himself and overthrow those who wanted to thwart His plans. I sensed that this night would be the night when those of us who had followed Him faithfully would receive our due reward. We would be exalted with Him.

I'm a fisherman, not a soldier, but in His strength I knew I could single-handedly slay the whole Roman regiment.

When we headed out of the city toward Gethsemane, we told Him that we had two swords. "That is enough," He said.

It sent a chill up and down my spine. It was exciting. At last it was going to happen. A bunch of peasants with two swords would take on the Roman army. And two swords would be enough to win--with Jesus' power behind us.

Stories of Gideon, Joshua, Jonathan coursed through my mind as we climbed toward Gethsemane. When Jesus stopped, I began to look around for a position that would be easy to defend. Then He invited James and John and me to come farther into the garden with Him. We left one sword with the other group, and of course I brought my sword along. It looked like Jesus was setting up two defensive lines between Himself and the garden entrance.

Then Jesus started to go farther, and He told us to stay where we were and pray.

Pray? I thought. The time for praying is over! We need to plan our strategy! I wanted to stake out the garden, rehearse our defensive and offensive moves, and be ready for any eventuality.

I almost suggested that to Jesus--I mean that we do that first, then have some time for prayer. I started to follow Him. But the way He looked at me--it was a full moon last night, you know. I could see Him almost as if it was daylight, and I could read His intentions.

I was too excited to pray. But I had learned to do whatever Jesus said. So I knelt down beside a stone outcropping, and went through the motions. Mostly repeating something about "Give me strength to fight this fight for Jesus."

I don't know how it could have happened when I was so excited. I noticed that James and John had fallen asleep in the midst of their prayers, and then the next thing I knew, Jesus was waking me up.

I was embarrassed that I had fallen asleep on guard duty. But Jesus just told me to watch and pray lest I enter into temptation.

I was determined to stay awake after that. But it was so peaceful there. And I was so tired.

Twice more Jesus found me sleeping. I wasn't as strong as I thought I was. If only He had asked me to pace back and forth on guard duty or something, that would have been easier. But to pray? I was too sleepy for that.

Now I wish I would have prayed. I wish I had known what to pray about.

The mob arrived just after Jesus awakened me for the third time. When I saw Judas, I thought he was bringing some of Jesus' friends to help us defend Him. I was getting ready to make some suggestions about defensive positions, when I heard Jesus say something about betrayal.

Then when He said "I am He," I knew the final battle had begun. They all fell down--prostrated by His power!

But then He let them get up again.

Then they grabbed Him and started to take Him away. This is it! I thought.

"Shall we strike with the sword?" someone asked. But for me it was no time for questions. I rushed forward, holding my sword with both hands. I brought it down with all my strength on the head of one of the men closest to Jesus, but all I managed to hit was his ear.

At that instant Jesus broke free of His captors. He didn't throw them off, or struggle with them. He just raised His arm, and they were powerless to hold Him. I knew then that I had done the right thing. This was what Jesus had been waiting for--to see whether I would stand beside Him--to risk my life for Him. My action had given Him the cue to act against His enemies!

Then . . . I couldn't believe it. . . . He reached out and healed the man's ear! And then He turned to me and rebuked me! "Put your sword back into its place;" He said. "For all who take the sword will perish by the sword."

It took all the fight right out of me. It was just the opposite of what I had expected. Healing the enemy's troops instead of His own!

When they led Him away, I followed--I was determined not to abandon Him. I would prove my loyalty. . . .

But it all happened so fast. I had stuck with Jesus. But things weren't going at all like I had thought they would. Instead of triumphing over His enemies, Jesus was being beaten down by them. It was like they had caught Him at a bad time--He hadn't slept all night--He was just too worn out to defend Himself anymore.

It was clear that for the first time in His life Jesus was losing the battle. I couldn't understand it. But in my mind all the power He had exercised just evaporated--and somehow my faith went with it.

In that state of despair and confusion, I reacted suddenly--instinctively--to the maid who pointed me out as a disciple. I was right in the middle of a bunch of soldiers--the very ones I had thought I was going to fight--when she pointed to me. "No I'm not!" It came out before I even had time to think.

Twice more I denied Him--but by then I'd had time to think about it. I had even resolved to do better. Still, when the time came, the right words just wouldn't come.

Then the cock crowed. Then Jesus looked at me.

That look

That's why I have to see Him, to talk to Him again. I have to be sure He understands. I could see that He knew what I had done. He could see right down to my soul. But I still need to talk with Him To hear Him say that He understood and will forgive me--give me another chance. . . .

NARRARTOR:

Thank you Peter. Thank you to each of those who has been called to testify this evening. Clearly something very significant has happened here at Calvary today.

And now, members of the board of Inquiry: The question comes to you. Is there any significance to what you have heard recounted here? Did you perhaps hear, or see yourself in any of the testimonies presented? Did what happened here today have any significance? Will it make any difference tomorrow?

Does it make any difference in your life?

Complete directions for producing this drama as reader's theater complete with music is available. For information, e-mail spiritquest@sbcglobal.net

Back to At the Cross page | Back to Jesus Central | Back to SpiritQuest