For Moms. (Everyone else can listen)
The book of Genesis we have the beautiful
story of the creation
of mankind. How God stooped down, and
with his hands gathered
clay and formed a man and breathed into
him the breath of life.
Then, after man was able to recognize
his loneliness, after he
noticed that all the animals had their
two parts, male and
female, and that he was only half there,
God put him to sleep
and took part of his body and formed the
other part of man. It
is interesting that if you look at the
original language here
what it describes is the man or human,
and the female of the man
or human. It describes beautifully the
equality of M/F.
The Bible goes to describe the fall, and
how Satan, through the
women enticed the man to take of that
which he knew he
shouldn't, and as result they were
both thrown out of the
garden. It was after this happened that
man was put in charge of
the family. Before, they had communed
with Christ, and He had
taught and directed them. Now that personal
contact was
impossible, and the man was given the
duties of Husband.
We should take note that after the fall,
mankind was no longer
living in the ideal circumstances that
he had been before. Two
perfect beings would have automatically
moved in the same
direction, for the same purposes. But
once sin entered the
picture, for two to be in perfect unity
one had to set the
direction one was to follow. As long as
the leader is following
the ways of God in the Spirit of Christ,
this is good and proper.
However, this was not to be. For the majority
of the population
has taken, is taking, and will take the
path of least
resistance, and move directly against
the will of God. Thus you
have historically, that mankind has taken
the initiative to be
the head of the household and of the wife,
but has not followed
the direction of God in assuming this
responsibility. Before
going any farther, let me way that the
man who claims his
authority in the family without acknowledging
the authority of
Christ over him, is taking a position
never granted him by God.
And this opens up an area of problems for
many Christian women,
for it seems that in our time, the women
are more susceptible o
the workings of the Spirit of God, and
often end up taking the
spiritual leadership of the family because
of the abdication of
the husband and father in this area.
We have record of this in the Bible, where
Moses had delayed
doing God's will in circumcising himself
and his children, and
his wife took the initiative and saved
them all from
destruction.
But what does the Christian woman
do when she is faced with an
unbelieving husband? How does she divide
her loyalties? What are
her priorities? Should a Christian wife
leave an unbelieving
husband, or as far as that goes, the other
way around?
Ellen White once gave the following advice
to a woman in this
predicament The husband was not a believer,
and he did his best
to make it hard for the mother to train
her children in the
Lord. He was a person who used profanity,
and was vulgar and
abusive in his language to his wife. He
went so far at to teach
the children that it wasn't necessary
to obey their mother.
while she would try to pray with the children
he would come in
and make all the noise that he could,
and would curse God and
curse the Bible. The woman became very
discouraged, quite
naturally, and felt that if she left she
could do some good
somewhere else. Perhaps she could find
somewhere else to labor
for her God.
The advice was given "whatever trials you
may be called to
endure through poverty, through wounds
and bruises of the soul,
from the harsh overbearing of the husband
and father, do not
leave your children: do not give them
up to the influence of a
godless father. Your work is to counteract
the work of the
father, who is apparently under the control
of Satan."
We should all remember that the main duty
of every Christian is
to draw others to Christ. If you have
a husband, or wife, who
seems to be pulling away from God, it
is your duty to attempt to
win that person over to the side of the
Savior. It is hard. It
is a discipline, but the spouse of a non-believe.
should be the
living example of patience and self control.
Everything within
your power should be done to draw that
person to see Christ,
without yielding up one principle of truth.
Be patient,
considerate, forbearing. Live your beliefs,
don't talk them. Do
not stop loving that person. Use the love
that you have for them
to bring you closer together, and if you
are close to Christ,
then the closer your spouse becomes to
YOU, the closer be will
be be God
The pattern is: Obey God, please your spouse whenever you can.
But what of authority? The Christian always
has his first
allegiance to God. God does not
require that a woman obey her
husband if he would have her go against
the law of God. Even in
marriage the women is an individual. had
been personally been
bought with the blood of Christ and she
does not belong to
herself or to her husband.
Ellen White wrote to a newly married
woman who found that she
had ended up with a spoiled godless youth.
She says, "(Your)
marriage was a deception of the devil.
Yet now you should make
the best of it and treat your husband
with tenderness, and make
him as happy as you can without violating
your conscience; for
if he remains in his rebellion, this world
is all the heaven he
will have.
But to deprive yourself of the privilege
of meetings to gratify
an overbearing husband possessing the
spirit of the dragon is
not according to God's will."
Finally, She makes the following statement,
which can sum up
what may be the best that can happen;
If you can save only a
part of your family, it is much better
than to loose all.
Barbara Johnson made this statement
about motherhood. She said
"If it was going to be easy to raise kids,
it never would have
started with something called labor."
(--Barbara Johnson, Stick
a Geranium In Your Hat And Be Happy, Word,
1990, p. 17. )
Mothering is an idea that does not have
a lot of favor with some
these days, and many who call themselves
by this title have
done nothing to deserve it. Contrary to
what we hear so much
today' I believe that motherhood is the
most important and
uplifting work that a woman tan take on.
It also requires more skill, patience,
energy, perseverance, and
time than any other. Perhaps that is why
so many are defaulting
on their responsibility. Not only that,
I believe that it is the
most important work that any human being
can be involved in.
What the world needs more of now is mothers.
Mothers who are not
mothers only in title, but who are mothers
in function. I think
that it is safe to say that the distinctive
duties of woman are
more sacred, more holy than of man, and
women should realize
that they are engaged in a sacred work
when they take on the
challenge of bringing up Christian children
in a pagan world.
This is a challenge that includes molding
the character of her
children that they might be fitted for
a higher immortal life.
The mother is God's agent to Christianize
her family. This
thought is interesting in the light of
the feminist assertions
along with those of Marx and Hagle that
the family structure as
we have it must die and the state take
over the responsibility
of raising the children. And by
the way, the government is
moving in that direction.
She is to be the agent in perpetuating
the values of
Christianity, and of a free society as
a whole, and the Devil
knows this and does whatever he can to
see that mothers that are
not doing this work.
This work of influencing the child for
the Lord takes many and
varied turns. First, it requires that
the mother be close to the
Lord herself. The good that she will do
will far surpass
anything that preacher could
do because of the sheer weight of
time that she spends with them. The word
instructs us, God's
children, to instruct our children of
his way and love here a
little and there a little, when we stand
up and sit down. This
we do from the the Word. This a mother
does by her actions and
attitudes. She has to remember that if
the child sees her throw
a tantrum, the child will assume that
is proper behavior. Satan
knows this and tries to reach those little
ones by influencing
the mother to do things that the children
will mimic.
Unfortunately, some mothers feel that they
are doing an
unimportant and thankless work. there
are no engraved
cornerstones on a clean kitchen, or on
the legs of a growing
child. Often she will feel that she is
in a round of drudgery
that will not stop, and that she has accomplished
nothing. But
this is not true. This duty of the mother
is so important that
nothing should be allowed to take its
place. Not even being
directly connected with active work in
the church.
No work is more important than the work
of a mother, and the
mother that ignores her duties as wife
and mother and asks for
some great work to do instead is going
against what the Lord has
desired. The mother should not even accept
positions the church
which would compel her to neglect the
children .
A mother should have fixed principles.
The devil is after her
with everything that he has to sidetrack
her from this, just
like he is the children and the father.
There are so many
things to do and read and watch now that
we can become quite
absorbed in them. How many moms do you
know, or any one as far
as that goes, who will not let any any
interfere with their
social time each day....... not with the
Lord, but with their
favorite soap opera. By the way,
I doubt that you can point out
any of these programs that consistently
uphold the principles of
good and virtue that are so necessary
to the Christian life.
Sometimes work comes before the raising
of children. There are
many children of Christian families who
are being sacrificed to
a new house or new car, because mom has
to work to get these
things rather than making do with something
a little less
expensive.
KATHLEEN AND JONATHAN KUNTARAF write in an article:
We, Kathleen and Jonathan, travel extensively
in our work for
the church, and often have to deal with
this situation. We
suggest:
1. Mothers need to be with their children
during their infancy
and preschool age. When they reach
school age, mothers may take
part-time jobs_going to work while
the children are in school,
and being at home upon their return from
school. Ellen White
admonishes mothers: "The first great business
of your life is to
be a missionary at home" (Testimonies,
vol. 4, p. 138).
2. A mother, counsels Ellen White, should
"be careful how she
trusts the molding of fhe infant
mind to other hands"
(Fundamentals of Christian Edrscation,
pp. 156, 157). Unless we
can find someone whom we can fully
trust, we should not leave
our children to other people.
The Christian mother and wife, or anyone
else, should keep
herself up.
An important part of this is regular physical
exercise. Mothers
should be health reformers, not in the
kooky sense of the word,
but they should be knowledgeable in the
area of foods and diet,
and through correct diet should protect
her family against
disease and weakness.
She should not run around the house looking
like a scarecrow. I
am not saying that she has to be dressed
fit to kill all the
time, but if she keeps clean and neat,
even if in worn clothes,
there will be an example set for the children,
and the husband
will respect her more for it. This will
influence the children
to be of a cleaner and neater themselves.
By their example and
teaching, mothers should guide their children
to be clean ,
neat, and tidy in their home and in their
personal appearance.
As she studies the instruction given in
the Word of the Lord it
goes a long way in helping solve the little
and larger problems
that wifehood and motherhood are faced
with.
The Lord requires submission in the Lord
that the family might
run smoother. Submission not to any other
male around you, which
is a point that perhaps should be better
understood, but only to
your husband in the Lord. Not denying
your individuality, your
special talents or interests. Pulling
together to bring your
family closer to God, and closer to each
other.
But the Lord also requires that he be the
first in your lives.
That you work with your husband to bring
up the children in the
ways of the Lord. That your Christian
influence is such that
others want to know more of the Lord.
That we should become one
in our families just as Jesus and his
father are one. One in
love, purpose, desire, and concern. That
our words might build
rather than destruct. That our influences
might join rather than
divide.
Mothers, God has called you to a work that
is more important
than what I do. He has called you
to help Him mold little lives
to be like His life. And you need
help from on high.
Today I want to have a special prayer for
you. And as we pray,
I am going to ask those who are kneeling
near you to just place
their hands on your heads or shoulders
in a statement of
blessing.